Thank you very much for your query. I'm sorry to hear that you did not get a chance to visit the grave you were looking for. If you are looking for marriage, birth and death records for the mid 19th century, you should be in luck. Most of these records are held by the General Register Office (GRO). If you are looking for burial locations, i would suggest you write to the parish priest of the area, who should be able to assist you. Of course, the local community on the IRO website might be able to give these details also. If the GRO does not have the records you are looking for, try writing to the parish priest who should be able to help you.
In the meantime, keep checking the IRO website. Someone from the community should be able to help you out in time.